Cigar Quotes

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.
George Burns

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
George Burns

There are men here and there to whom the whole of life is like an after-dinner hour with a cigar; easy, pleasant, empty, perhaps enlivened by some fable of strife to be forgotten - before the end is told - even if there happens to be any end to it.
Joseph Conrad

I did the cover of Cigar Aficionado, so I'm supposed to talk about loving cigars. I've smoked them a couple of times. My father used to smoke cigars. I love the idea and the concept, and I love the smell of cigars.
Gina Gershon

If you want a midget to look like a baby, don't put a cigar in his mouth.
Chuck Jones

I even smoke in bed. Imagine smoking a cigar in bed, reading a book. Next to your bed, there's a cigar table with a special cigar ashtray, and your wife is reading a book on how to save the environment. Raul Julia

Maybe it's like becoming one with the cigar. You lose yourself in it; everything fades away: your worries, your problems, your thoughts. They fade into the smoke, and the cigar and you are at peace. Raul Julia
A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.
Rudyard Kipling

I never can understand how anyone can not smoke it deprives a man of the best part of life. With a good cigar in his mouth a man is perfectly safe, nothing can touch him, literally.
Thomas Mann

What this country needs is a really good five cent cigar.
Thomas R. Marshall

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx

I didn't play at collecting. No cigar anywhere was safe from me.
Edward G. Robinson

I have made it a rule never to smoke more that one cigar at a time.
Mark Twain

I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke every last one of 'em.
Ron White

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said "CIGARETTES CONTAIN FAT." Dave Barry

If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.
Mark Twain

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.
Mark Twain

The end of a good smoke is a little saddening. In some regard, it's a bit like losing a best friend who had time to sit and listen.
ZenWarrior

"If I had taken my doctor's advice and quit smoking when he advised me to,I wouldn't have lived to go to his funeral."
George burns at age 98

"If your wife doesn't like the aroma of your cigar, change your wife."
Zino Davidoff